I’ve had an epiphany recently that is personal and completly about me, but its crazy how much I have started to notice how it actually effects people around me,
So a little back story.. Growing up my mother was never the touchy feely kind of mom. She loved us deeply and each of us knew that without a doubt. But she wasn’t the cuddly type of mom. As I have now become a mom myself, I often find its likes I look at myself in the mirror but I see my MOM! The same goes with my relationship. My Fiance grew up with a very different mom. She was very loving and he basically had a very different relationship with his mother than I did I growing up. So he often feels like I don’t “love” him/ feels like Im not acting how I would if I was truly in love.
See thats where arguments start because I get so frustrated. So frustruated that In my heart I know he is my soul mate and the love of my life. But because I grew up differently and had my parents relationship as an example of what love was (my mom is just not touchy feely)… It places doubt, insecurity, sadness, or whatever emotion in my fiances head.
That’s why I feel l like it is very important in relationships to communicate and be as patient as possible when your significant other is either triggered or just feeling not enough love in the way they need to feel it.
By getting upset, nothing good comes from it. Try to remain calm and loving and reasure them. Hey Im not saying Im perfect at doing so. Often I do get irritated easily about it and can be snappy. But all that causes is much more of a ruckess then just putting your pride aside and recognizing you are needed by your partner to be kind, loving, and understanding.